Letter To My Future Wife

Dear My Future Wife,

How are you? I hope this letter finds you well and in a space to receive it. I can only imagine what you may be thinking at this point. Your thoughts may range from “Why is he writing a letter to me when he probably hasn’t met me yet” to “Why doesn’t he just wait to tell me this face to face”? All valid thoughts that I hope this letter will explain at some point.
Where do I begin? Well, I want you to know that I have been doing a lot of thinking about you, me and us. I know it might seem strange to think about something that I don’t have yet but actually it is not. Before I made my first jump shot, I thought about it. Before I scored my first touchdown, I thought about it. Before I got behind the wheel of a car for the first time, I thought about what it would feel like to drive. So you see it is not that difficult to think about you, my future wife.

I want to you know in advance that I am not perfect. I am prone to do some things that may leave you scratching your head. I did the same thing to my mom as a boy. Maybe it comes from my incessant need to prove to myself that I am the man. I don’t know. But I want you to know that I will always do the best I can for you, me and us. But it doesn’t mean that I won’t make my mistakes along the way. When I say I will do my best, it simply means that I will try my hardest to make sure that you and our family don’t have to pay for my mistakes.

I have a past. So do you. I don’t want either of our pasts to potentially damage our great future, my future wife. My growth as your future husband is incumbent on several things. Don’t keep me out emotionally when you are confronted with things you think I won’t understand. Allow our future relationship to be your place of rest and refuge. Talk with me not at me. Have faith in me even when you are struggling to find it. Always tell me the truth even when you think it might hurt my feelings. Believe that us as one can conquer anything this world throws our way. Trust me even if you have struggled to trust men of your past.
My future wife, I don’t want you to be perfect. I know that is not possible. I do not intend to marry you because you are perfect. I understand that you will be flawed because you are a human being before you are my future wife. I am going to marry you because I am going to be in love with you and I don’t want to live my life without you. I am marrying you because I have faith that you are the woman who was created for me. I am marrying you because you are everything I want and need in a future wife. I am marrying you because you are perfect for me. You will give me a sense of purpose that I never thought was possible before I met you. I started contemplating that purpose when I first thought of you – but once I find you, I will be on the path of something greater. I will be grateful to walk that path with you.

My future wife, our children will benefit from our relationship. Material items are nice and I am sure we will have them for our family. But the real benefits they will receive won’t be material. Our children will know how to love because they see it from us every day. I will kiss you in front of our kids (even when they go “ewww”). I will dance with you in front of our kids so they know it is okay for mommy and daddy to have fun too. We will laugh a lot. They will also learn how to resolve conflict from us. They will learn that respect starts at home. We, as their future parents, will respect them as the future individuals they were made to be. We will teach them character and morals, not in what we say but how we act and what we do. They will learn what a great relationship is like not from TV or music or the internet, but from us. They will know that they are important to us. But they will also know that no one is more important on this earth to me than you, my future wife.

I hope you are emotionally preparing yourself for what is to come. I don’t want you hold bitterness or anger from the last guy you wanted to be with in a relationship. I am not him and I don’t want to feel like I will pay for his transgressions. Those happenings had to happen to bring you to me and me to you. My future wife, sometimes I may do something that will remind you of him. Let me be clear – I am not him. I am me. Please remember that. If you haven’t already, forgive the things he did to you for you. If you struggle with that, I will do my best to support you through it. But ultimately, it falls on you.

My future wife, as I close this out, I want you to know that I can’t promise you that our relationship won’t have its bumps. It would be disingenuous for me to suggest otherwise. What I can promise is that our future will be filled with more smiles than frowns, more happy cries than sad ones, more joy than pain and more accomplishments than failure as long as we have each other and allow nothing to get in the way of it. Always know that I have love in my heart for you long before you become my future wife. I hope and pray our future always is truly forever.
I love you (even though you might not know it yet),

Your Future Husband